so temporary...

As I sit here and write this, I ponder on the phone call that I received a few hours ago. My 'grandma' (not blood related) is probably going to meet Jesus tonight. Bad fall, old age...they don't mix well.

It, of course, makes me think about our life on earth and how temporary it is. How this is not my 'home'. It is only for now. Heaven is my home, where I belong.

I decided to pull out the book of Galatians, and I ran across the freedom that we have in Christ and life in Him!
The Message describes it as this:

"What actually took place is this: I tried keeping rules and working my head off to please God, and it didn't work. So I quit being a "law man" so that I could be God's man. Christ's life showed me how, and enabled me to do it. I identified myself completely with him. Indeed, I have been crucified with Christ. My ego is no longer central. It is no longer important that I appear righteous before you or have your good opinion, and I am no longer driven to impress God. Christ lives in me. The life you see me living is not "mine," but it is lived by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me. I am not going to go back on that. Is is not clear to you that to go back to that old rule-keeping, peer-pleasing religion would be an abandonment of everything personal and free in my relationship with God? I refuse to do that, to repudiate God's grace. If a living relationship with God could come by rule-keeping, then Christ died unnecessarily."

Gahhh the freedom that we have in Christ! I recently came upon a person very dear to me who thought that, in order to get to heaven, we must 'be good, do good things.' How discouraging/ discomforting/all of the above. To think that I would ever have to be good enough to get to heaven. To think that its something I do. To think that every day I would wake up telling myself, 'Mindy, you must be on your best behavior today if you want that eternal life.' That is not freedom. That is not living a life because of God's grace. That is living a guilty, convicted, no good life in which there is no escape!

Good news, ladies and gents! Because of faith in Christ, we have total FREEDOM! The whole purpose of Jesus' death was because of my sin, your sin. He literally died the most sinful human being, not because he himself ever sinned, but because he carried all of my crap on his shoulders!! How awesome that he made that sacrifice for me, for you. Once for all!

I bring up my grandma because I think of how many people may pass without that freedom. To all of you who have lived your lives/ are currently living under guilt, not feeling good enough for our Lord, under the impression from other people that you have to DO SOMETHING for God, to get into heaven, I apologize on their behalf.

Be free! Know that we have a LOVING God who knows that it is not even possible for us to be good enough for him because of our human nature. That's why he saved our lil booties! He gives us his love, his forgiveness, his grace every single day because he knows that we need it and because he knows that it gives us freedom from everything that tends to weigh us down.

"..who loved me and gave himself for me."

the little things

God just makes me smile. He is soooo good & so faithful. Today was one of those rejuvenating days. To the core, I was replenished. In conversation, in hugs, in laughter, in smiles, in the sight of giggling little girls, in words of wisdom, in prayer, in hope, in goodbyes, in dirty diapers (yes, dirrrrty), in new friendships, in old lasting friendships, over coffee, over lunch, over dinner. He knew today was needed and he provided me with it.

I don't have too much to complain about but I tend to forget that. That simple little list was enough to make my week. It's the simple things. And God gives them to me. He knows who to place in my life when he wants, he knows what connections he wants to make, he knows how to reveal himself in the simplest things. Lately, he never ceases to amaze me.

made perfect. in weakness.

Paul (an apostle called by God) suffered. He had been in prison, been flogged, beaten, stoned, shipwrecked. He had been in danger from rivers, bandits, his own countrymen. He went without sleep, without food, without water. He had been cold and naked. Amidst all of this, he pleaded, on more than one occasion, to the Lord to take it away from him.

The Lord's response?

"My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness."

Paul's response?

"Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me. That is why, for Christ's sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong."

I don't know about you, but I can most definitely say that if I had went through all of the above suffering that Paul went through, it would probably be reeeeeeally hard for me to boast about my weaknesses. Paul had previously said that he would not boast about himself, except about his weaknesses. The whole point of his boasting was "for Christ's sake".

I guess that's what I'm about to do. I take no credit. I want God to have it. For making me feel broken. So broken. For making me feel weak. For making me feel lonely. For making me literally cry out to him.

The Lord's response (written above) is one I have heard over and over and over again. But, I do not think it was until just now, just recently, that I have really experienced what that means. I have witnessed  God's power working through me because of these broken times. It's very easy, when life is going easy, to not depend on God for much because it feels as if he is already providing everything. For some reason, it takes brokeness, weakness, and loneliness for me to realize that I have no other choice but to lean on him. To depend on him. To trust him.

"For when I am weak, then I am strong." Strong in the Lord because he is first strong for me.

2 Corinthians 12:9-10

music? (and coffee).

Aside from my heavenly Father, one super family, and some LEGIT friends, I have a love for music and coffee...maybe an addiction?


What is it about being able to connect with a certain song, under certain circumstances, for a certain period of time? Singing to yourself those certain lyrics over and over and over again because you feel them, you connect with them in a way that feels as if they are seeping through your skin, and they were basically written for you. 


Even though my boy Jake Gerald-Louis Griedl is probably thinkin that my music selection must broaden its horizons (and it has thanks to him) before I can express all of my love toward it, we have recently experienced, together, a new found love of thee Lecrae. Christian. Rap artist. Yes, those three words go very well together. Aside from Jake dancin his lil booty off to Killa & 40 Deep (which have pretty legit beats), there is this one song. 


Background.


"It's evident you run the show, so let me back down
You take the leadin role, and I'll play the background
I know I miss my cues, know I forget my lines
I'm stickin to your script, and I'm readin all your signs
I don't need my name in lights, I don't need a starring role
Why gain the whole wide world, if I'm just gonna lose my soul?
And my ways ain't purified, I don't live according to Your Word
I can't endure this life without Your wisdom being heard
So word to every dancer for a pop star
'Cuz we all play the background, but mine's a rockstar
Yeah, so if you need me I'll be staged right
Prayin the whole world would start embracin stage fright
So let me fall back, stop giving my suggestions
'Cuz when I follow my obsessions, I end up confessin
That I'm not that impressive, matter of fact I'm who I are
A trail of stardust leadin to the superstar"




I think I'm at a point in my life where I am finally starting to understand what it means to take the background. I don't need to be center stage. I didn't write my own script. I don't know where I'm going. I can't see my last scene.  


My Father does. For cryin out loud, he knew, before I was even conceived, where he was takin me on this craaazy journey of life!! How sweet that God is, and able to be, center stage on my behalf. I'm tired of tryin to pull it off by myself. I can't. 


"In his heart a man plans his course, but the Lord determines his steps" Proverbs 16:9

OR

"We plan the way we want to live, but only God makes us able to live it" Proverbs 16:9 (the message)

Thanks God! Thanks for pushin me out of the leading role and you, yourself takin over!!

quenching.my.thirst.

this one's for you, my hailey jo!

quenching my thirst....."May God place a need, desire and ache deep within your soul that only the word can quench." When Hailey and I started our 'Haidy' (hehe) devo's....she wrote this in the front of my journal. It has stuck with me ever since.

We all have physical needs. Hunger. Thirst. Etc.

Even more, spiritual needs. Just like I can't survive without water, I can't survive without my heavenly Father. I can't survive this crazy, shattered, messed up world without knowing and owning who God is and who he wants me to be. His word. That's what quenches my thirst, my spiritual thirst, for him.

...demolish?

demolish..

-to break to pieces.

I will never forget attending chapel one morning. There was a guest speaker. His name, no clue. His purpose, no idea. All I will remember, forever, is that he stood up, showed us his Bible, and it was apparent that he was a man of God. Why? Because his Bible was demolished, and that's exactly what he called it. He had, and still was, in the process of breaking it to pieces. He knew what it said. He knew who it was written to. He knew it had purpose in his life.

From that moment on, as oxymoron as it is, I was envious of him. I wanted to demolish my own Bible. I wanted it to appear to be torn, spilled with ink, almost ripped to shreds.

Moses, in Exodus 34:29ish, after coming from the presence of God, was radiant. He was literally shining. People noticed. And they thought it to be weird. What does that look like for me today? When I come from the presence of God, spending time with him in prayer, diggin in his Word, am I shining? Is it obvious that I just came from spending some legit time with my Father? I only pray that my time with him rubs off onto others. As was once said...I may be the only Bible some people read.